anthropomagic

“Chivalry is Dead”

Yes, it is. As it should be.

(Unless you are reenacting medieval culture)

Let’s backtrack a little. Women’s outcry about the death of chivalry, has been both prominent on social media as well as in public spaces and it’s an issue I felt I needed to address. Here, let me give you an example:

 

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And then a bit more subtle:

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(There’s so much wrong with this picture. Real man? Seriously? What if he doesn’t do it? Does it make him a monkey?)

The issue with these memes however can be summed up in this picture:

funny-chivalry-system-complain-equal-society

The reason why chivalry has been argued against by feminists or women in general, is quite simple: it makes women seem dependent on men’s help. The Oxford dictionaries define modern chivalry as “courteous behaviour, especially that of a man towards women”. We commonly associate courteous behaviour with actions such as holding the door open, “ladies first”, moving the chair for women, etc. And that is all nice. However, if we want to keep the word “chivalry” in our dictionary, we should start associating it with non-age/gender specific courteous behaviour. Assumptions such as “oh, he’s helping me because I’m a woman” or “he should help me, I’m a woman” should become a thing of the past. Relations, no matter how brief should be based on respect and courtesy, making everyone  happy, including feminists such as the one below.

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11 thoughts on ““Chivalry is Dead”

  1. Well, chivalry, is it a concept that man created to flirt with a woman? Perhaps. Or a definition of how to behave in public, from Jane Austin? Is it a tag? Shouldn’t we, all, both man and woman, redefine ‘chivalry’ or ban this concept? Let ‘chivalry’ not replace the everyday social interaction of humans crossing each other’s path. Why make being kind to one another, such as a smile, a gesture of consideration, a gender issue? Does politeness insinuate “you’re weaker”? Then when do we stop bickering and get the sexual issues out of the way? Let’s be zen, accepting a kind gesture with dignity, creates a peaceful environment , perhaps in a temporal way, but for the giver of the kind gesture and the recipient of that gesture, perhaps a smile in their hearts, for the rest of the day. It wipes away the impersonal world, if only for a short moment. In conclusion, shunning a kind consideration, albeit, a kind gesture, is creating along the lines of the cold war ( macho-feminist ) world we live in. Slogans ‘real man’ or the sixties ‘burn your bra’ proliferate confused male-female relations. Let’s think positive, and harness any off the mark gestures, it is of cognitive value for all, both the giver and recipient. Thank you for the the blog and the way to express my innermost thoughts on human relations. Have peaceful day!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I see equality among my colleagues every day. Women lifting heavy loads and holding doors open for men who are in a hurry. Men making coffee and bringing cups to the desks of women colleagues. Men bringing their special blend of curry spices to make the afternoon meal outdoors at camp retreat while the women play volleyball indoors. Normal. Love it. Thank you for this lovely reflection. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  3. On independence: can you think how limited the definition of independence is, when an opening of a door threatens it?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sabiscuit, to explain on how to promote Love, is to continue sharing Love, not the physical kind, but the sharing of the way it is meant, as you saw it, when someone came up to you and said thanks for the door….

    Like

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