My Thoughts On, Uh… Religion
It’s troublesome, to say the least.
However, before I continue I would like you to give you, Dear Reader, a warning. This post might offend you if you are a religious person. I, sincerely and with my warmest regards, would advise you to stop reading now and discover a less controversial blog in the very loving space we call the Internet.
Seriously, stop. In the end this post will just make you feel miserable, and believe me when I say, I really want you to have a good day.
Unless you are a hateful and bigoted person. In that case, please go to hell. (HAHAHAHA)
Also Mom, if you haven’t stopped reading by now, you really should. Please. (italics and bold letters added for overwhelming emphasis)
And so, once upon a time, I was baptised at the age of two, which apparently made me old enough to hold a huge lit candle (I didn’t set fire to the church, so I guess it was okay). I went to a private Catholic school until grade 11, when I moved to Canada. The school I went to as a child had its issues, but generally I had quite a lot of fun being the class tomboy (in the picture below I’m hugging St Nicholas from the right). Though, I do remember the time, when the principal nun forbid a student from inviting classmates to see Harry Potter for the first time, since the magic depicted was considered evil. There are a few more instances when the school would meddle in the children’s lives outside of school, but I didn’t think much of it at the time, because in the end I was religious as well. I was a rebellious kid, but I still got good grades, so I wasn’t in trouble most of the time (haha, no. You’re not going to make me digress any more).
Things changed when I turned fourteen. Bad things happened that made me question the existence of god. I hated going to Sunday mass, so I usually snuck out to the small park that was in front of the church. There, I would sit down on one of the rotting benches and stare at the sky, contemplating why should I be wasting time on an invisible being, while I would very much prefer to be enjoying the real ones instead. Or at least visible ones. I couldn’t make Naruto and Kim Possible wait for me any longer!!!
To this day, and I want to make it very clear, I will always respect the beliefs of other people. I’m not trying to discredit their faith, but I am trying to explain why a Catholic person like me, became more of an agnostic than anything else. I don’t really identify with either agnostics or atheists, because I just really don’t care. What I believe in the most, is to live your life to the fullest, while remembering you only have one.
As I have mentioned, my line of questioning god, started when things took a darker turn in my life. As always, I would dismiss my own problems and tell myself there’s countless children out there that have it worse than me. After all, I have a roof over my head, food on the table, and an education (sort of). So then, why would god let things happen to innocent people around the world? Or me? The answer I always received was that he just kept testing my faith. And I was like “huh?”, what is he, my math teacher tormenting me for fun? When I didn’t look convinced enough, I was told “god works in mysterious ways”. That was like telling me I’ve solved all the math problems correctly, but my teacher “worked in mysterious ways”, so he gave me an F and slapped me on the face to make sure I believe him.
Anyway, while researching, examples to explain how I felt, I came across this quote:
Things just did not add up. Keep in mind, I am still thinking of the Catholic god, asking him in my mind (as if he’s actually there) “what the heck, dude?”. Why is he depicted as a man anyway? I started finding issues with the holy teachings and the bible.
Timothy 2:12 “I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man; she must be quiet.” Tim, I really don’t think you’d like it here today, with all the equality going on and such.
And so I researched more online. Apparently Peter condoned slavery (1 Peter 2:18):
“Slaves, in reverent fear of God submit yourselves to your masters, not only to those who are good and considerate, but also to those who are harsh.” I guess, both Tim and Pete had similar views on equality, hmm.
And so, instead of looking at the bible as a holy text, I started to see it more as a historical account of the customs and traditions in ancient cultures. The ideas seemed just way too outdated to apply to our lives today. And after all:
Then a thought crept into my mind. What if I was going to be sent to hell for having such blasphemous thoughts? In the end having an eternal life after death, sounds like pretty sweet deal. Then again:
After learning of the atrocities of the Catholic church allowed in the past, I would never be part of an institution like this again. In Canada alone, the stealing of Inuit children from their families to send them South to residential schools to be abused physically and emotionally, was enough for me to cringe every time I remembered I used to be part of that religion.
I personally, do not believe in god. I will not tolerate someone trying to impose their beliefs on me. I think that religion has caused a lot of harm, dividing people, breeding hate, and creating conflict. However, at the same time religion and faith has a lot of meaning to other people and sometimes allows them to be happy. Despite the awful things that the church has done, a lot of charities are founded by religious organisations. This is something I would never want to take away from anyone.
So, go forth and be happy! I love you all.